Expect the Best or Get Used to Less

Have you ever been disappointed by someone’s behavior, a friend who let you down, or a business deal that went south? You expected more, and they fell short. In fact, they didn’t just fail to meet the moment — they failed to exceed even the bare minimum. If so, you’re not alone. Disappointment is part of life. Some would argue that what really matters isn’t what happens, but who you become because of it. Of course, not everyone sees it that way. As author Sylvia Plath said, “If you don’t expect anything from anyone, you’re never disappointed.” Still, accepting less can dull your sense of what’s truly possible.

Now think about what that really means — lowering your standards just to avoid disappointment. That’s a tough pill to swallow.

Sure, if you assume everyone’s untrustworthy, you won’t be shocked by betrayal. But is living that way really the answer? Low expectations may shield you from pain — but also from progress — because you’ll never know your limits if you don’t challenge them.

What Do Your Standards Say About You?

Expectations aren’t just goals; they define the standards you hold yourself and others to. To uphold them, you must first clarify what they are and hold people accountable.

When you set expectations, do you challenge yourself to do your best, or do you settle for the bare minimum? Do you aim for what’s possible, or retreat to what’s comfortable? Do you call others out when they fall short, or let things slide?

Do you hold yourself — and others — to the standards you set when you:

Fall short of a goal.
Bend the truth.
Act like a hypocrite.
Forget your manners.
Fail to pull your weight.
Sell someone a bill of goods.
Treat people like second-class citizens.
Miss deadlines.
Do the bare minimum.
Keep others waiting without acknowledgment or apology.
Cut corners.
Break a promise.
Submit unfinished work.
Betray someone’s confidence.
Talk behind someone’s back.
Take things for granted.
Spread gossip.
Excuse inappropriate behavior.

Accepting low standards affects you in three key ways. First, when you lower your standards, you limit your potential — settling for less than you’re capable of. Like a thermostat, you never rise above your setting. Second, tolerating mediocrity sends the message that average is acceptable, lowering the bar for everyone. And third, you lead by example — whether you intend to or not. If you take the low road, don’t be surprised when others follow.

Raise the bar or prepare to trip over it.

Did You Ever See a Champion Who Expected to Lose?

Lowering expectations might spare your feelings, but it also limits your results. When you lower the bar, you get what you asked for: poor behavior, unprincipled actions, and mediocre performance. Make no mistake: When you accept less, you lower the bar for what’s acceptable in your life. Is that what you really want?

Sure, you won’t make waves, and things might come easy. But you’ll also have to settle — because it’s hard to be let down when you’re already sitting on the floor.

It’s actually a very simple choice. You can reach for the sky or settle for the bare minimum. The first option rewards your strength, courage, and determination. It builds self-esteem and fills you with pride. The latter keeps you in your comfort zone and makes life easy. In that case, you forfeit your true potential — and so does everyone around you. You owe it to yourself to give your best. As the saying goes, “The only thing you can do is the best you can do.” No one else can do that for you. Don’t settle. Expect the best or get used to less.